[Disclaimer: I don’t own Weiss Kreuz, I know. Please don’t
sue, I mean no harm.]
SLIP OF SANITY
WARNING: Dark. Yaoi. Character death.
ADD. NOTES: I was brushing my teeth and listening to Hallowed
Be Thy Name – the Cradle of Filth-version when this popped up. Show how
sane my muse is, right? :)
feel my sanity slipping.
tendrils, my mind drains itself as the mask I’ve always worn cracks a little
more for every moment that pass. Like ice, tiny, tiny icicles melting and
forming drops to run down my skin. They resemble blood. It’s beautiful to
watch from here, but I don’t believe that anyone else could appreciate it like
me. Not that I have to care about what they see me as by this time tomorrow, so
why bother now?
is bare, the four walls painted in stark white. I’m sitting on the bunk that
belongs with it, the blanket still untouched at my feet. I haven’t moved for
two days. I’ve had no reason to. The door is just across from me and I can see
the men and women of Kritiker out there, watching me and waiting for me to snap.
They can wait. I’m already crushed inside but nothing of it shows on my face
or my body language – or lack of.
Why am I
here, you wonder? Why am I stared at like some wild animal in fear and surprise?
Why don’t I move and demand them to let me out – my employers and friends?
answer is simple, really. To them, I’m nothing more than a criminal, a rabid
dog that needs to be put down before he can turn on his masters. To me… I’m
waiting for my release from this hell that was supposed to be my life. I’m
waiting for another chance, another shot at happiness.
you ask me why? What did I do?
answer is more than simple.
separated his head from his neck with my blade in anger and hurt and betrayal.
would do it all again, if I had to. Perhaps, this time, it would be enough.
Enough to stop him…
What would have caused me to turn on my own teammate like that, killing him
without second thought?
Schuldig was the cause. Yohji killed my lover in a fit of jealousy, he wanted Schuldig, so I killed him. An eye for an eye. Farfarello would understand. Weiss don’t. They never will. Ken and Omi have been at the other side of that door, stared at me as they were talking to Birman and Persia. Omi cried. And the ‘new’ Persia… Here, I can’t help but hold back a snicker – he thinks himself so powerful, so strong, but truth to be told, he isn’t. He’s as weak as those he has sworn to protect by allowing murder. By sending teams like Weiss out to clean the streets… At least the Takatori died an honourable death. This one won’t. Weak. I will spit on him, am I given the chance. I probably will be. He will be there, tomorrow at dawn, to see me fall. I will let him – I fell a long time ago, a little more won’t hurt me. Another thing they will never know…
Schu… He knew, and he understood. And now, for that, he’s dead. Waiting for
me in our own private hell. It doesn’t frighten me, not anymore. I am
twenty-two years old and I will be dead in four hours. Again, I smile, one that
I don’t think will reach my eyes. I hope that they’re watching – they got
their surveillance cameras up in the corner of the cell and I know that they
have been staring at me for two days. I haven’t cared.
Yohji shot him. Somehow, he managed to get his wire wrapped around his gun and
Schu dropped it. I didn’t believe it could happen, but it did. And so Yohji
I was by
Schu’s side when he died. I held him in my arms as he coughed up the last
blood – he was always one for the dramatics, he could have been a great actor
– and I heard his last words.
you around, Kätzchen…’
for famous last words. See you around…
He used to slip those words to me when he left in the mornings, when I was still
half asleep, to avoid a confrontation that neither of us would survive if my
teammates found out.
does. I have not one thing, not one soul, to hold me back here. Nothing I can
miss. Aya-chan… I haven’t spoken to her in two years – she turned her back
on me as soon as she found out what I had done. She told me that her brother
could never be a murderer and since that is what I am I was no longer her
to hold me back…
So I sit
here and wait, for dawn. Then, I will be a dead man walking, or whatever they
hope I get the chance to spit at Persia.
you around, Kätzchen…
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